Intro - The Waxing Diaries

So begins the blogging.  Let me introduce myself, and then you can decide whether this blog may be an interesting read. I am "The Wax Slinger".  I've been slinging wax in South Texas for 10 years now.  What does a "wax slinger" do, and why should this be an interesting read?  Technically, my license lists me as an esthetician, or facialist.  Traditionally, an esthetician does facials and skin care treatments, with a little waxing thrown in here and there to shape eyebrows, remove that mustache off your upper lip, etc. Can you say "boring" ???

Several years back  I made the decision to specialize in hair removal via waxing.  I like to call this "extreme body waxing".  Everything from legs, chest, back, inner nostrils, nipples, and the ever-so-popular Brazilian, both male and female.  Yes, people pay me to rip their hair out.  They pay me very well in fact, and many of them return for this ritual every month.  You can just imagine the type of relationship that develops when you have your face up in someone's junk,  month in and month out.  The stories I hear and the stories I have to tell.  I like to think of myself as the Carrie Bradshaw (Sex and the City)  of the waxing world.  Just so you know, the names have been changed to protect the "not so innocent".   So sit back, hold on tight, and get ready to "pee your pants" as I reveal

"The Waxing Diaries"

The Biker

A few years back I was meeting with a new male client. He was coming in for a male Brazilian waxing session.  Yep, "back,sac, and crack".  When he walked into my studio, I noticed that he was wearing his "colors"...For those of you who don't know, this is slang for a motorcycle rider who belongs to a certain club or gang,  and proudly displays their affiliation on a leather vest with patches identifying the club. The really bad ones  like Hells Angels and Bandidos,  are called "one percenters",   Here's an example of a guy wearing colors:



Ok, he didn't look as scary as this mongol dude, but you get my drift.  Now  I know what you're asking yourself right about now. How does the Wax Slinger know of such things?  Well," moi"  happens to  ride a 2006 Harley Davidson Softail Deluxe, blacked out with Bassani short shot pipes,  a Stage 1 done on the carborator,   that gives me more "rear thrust".  (Did I really just say  "rear thrust" on a brazilian waxing site???)

 Yeah I can walk the walk and talk the talk with the best of them...but before  you guys out there (and some of you girls) start fantasizing about me waxing you while wearing my black leather chaps, let me clear something up. 

But  the thing is, I wear scrubs to work, so there's no way "Biker Dude" could have known that I ride an 800 pound Harley, and proudly wear colors of my own. 

As Biker Dude settled in for his manzilian, I chatted it up as I usually do with new clients.  Before I knew it, I was rattling on about motorcycles.  He asked me if I had my own bike, and I proceeded to tell him all about my ride.  Then he asked me where I lived, and where I  liked to ride...I went on to tell him my favorite places to hang out.  Before long, I noticed he was not talking as much, in fact there was an uncomfortable silence taking over my room.  I chalked it up to the fact that I was waxing his "down under" , and he was probably a little nervous.  So the less he talked, the more I rattled on about motorcycles, just trying to help him through the  waxing experience.   I then  mentioned that I had met  some of the guys from his club at this biker bar near my house.  I think this is when he turned white as a sheet...oops...

You could have heard a pin drop in that room....After a deadening silence, I asked him what was wrong.  He looked up at me and with all sincereity said,  "You're not gonna tell my brothers I get my balls waxed, are ya?"...

Ahhhhhh, I had Biker Dude and his macho reputation, literally in the palm of my hands.. and was loving every minute of it...

Just another day in the life of a body waxer....Oh and by the way, Biker Dude is a regular client now, and has even asked me to ride with him sometime...It's all about trust baby.